No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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