We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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