i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
love makes seman taste better
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
