I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
