We're like a lot better than the average bears
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
