God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize