is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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