nut hugger
I just pynch a tree in the face
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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