i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize