I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
