I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize