I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
