Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
