wat bout pragnant strippers??
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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