Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
