there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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