saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Randomize
