BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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