Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
