Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
