Three words: puerto rican gang bang
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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