there's paper in my vomit.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I think your dad took our porno
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
