Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
