I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
