Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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