I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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