Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
