i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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