he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
