you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
