you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize