Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
