We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
i believe in u and ur pee
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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