Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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