just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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