Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Randomize
