I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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