What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
