btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
