If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
