Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
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