Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
