that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
