who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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