the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Ambien. No doubt about it.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Randomize
