Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize