Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize