best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
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