Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
God, I missed his penis.
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