Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
