Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Is Oprah even human
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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