For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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